In our latest viral video (Part 2), we dive deeper into the ongoing issue so many SEND families face: being denied permission to take a term-time holiday, even when it’s needed for wellbeing or regulation.
The comments under our first video were overwhelming. With over half a million views, hundreds of parents shared both success stories and heartbreaking examples of being fined, denied, or outright ignored. We read every single one, and this post is here to help clear up the confusion — and give you your best chance at getting it right next time.
Common Questions and Where Parents Went Wrong:
Q1: My child has an EHCP, so why was I still refused?
A: An EHCP alone doesn’t guarantee approval. The request needs to clearly show why the trip is essential to your child’s SEND needs, not just that they have a diagnosis. Use your child’s plan wording where possible.
Q2: The school said it was the LA’s decision — not theirs. Who is actually in charge?
A: Technically, it’s the headteacher who has the legal power to authorise an absence under ‘exceptional circumstances’. But many heads are under pressure from the local authority’s attendance teams — so it becomes a grey area. Your request must be bulletproof to pass through both.
Q3: I had backing from CAMHS or a paediatrician, and still got fined.
A: Sadly, medical backing isn’t always enough. What matters most is how well the letter is written — and whether it makes a strong legal and emotional case. The timing and tone of your request also matter.
Q4: Can I include siblings in the request?
A: Yes — but again, explain clearly how separating the family or forcing one child into a high-stress environment would negatively impact the SEND child’s wellbeing.
Q5: We were told it’s never allowed. Is that true?
A: No. It’s not true. Headteachers can approve time off under exceptional circumstances, and SEND-related wellbeing needs can fall under that category — if framed correctly.
Why So Many Are Getting Refused (Even With Legit Reasons)
After analysing all the comments and doing our legal research, we found that most refusals boiled down to 3 things:
- Requests weren’t detailed enough.
Vague reasons like “for wellbeing” or “it’ll help regulate them” don’t cut it. Be specific, use EHCP wording, diagnoses, and past evidence. - Wrong tone or timing.
Demands don’t work. Think collaborative, respectful, evidence-based. And ideally, request as early as possible. - Poorly structured letters.
Most parents used generic absence forms or just wrote a quick note. You need a tailored, legally-informed letter that ticks all the boxes — and anticipates objections.
✅ New Updated Template Letter & Checklist Available
We’ve taken on board everything and created a new and improved downloadable letter template, complete with a checklist to help you:
- Frame your request using the right language
- Include SEND-specific arguments backed by guidance
- Avoid the common mistakes that lead to rejection or fines
📥 Download it now at AskEllie.co.uk/templates
Final Word
This isn’t about gaming the system — it’s about making sure genuine needs are taken seriously. Our community is growing, and the more we share tools and strategies that work, the stronger we become.
📌 Watch Part 2 on TikTok
📎 Use AskEllie+ to help generate your letter and back it up with law
💬 Join the conversation in the comments — you’re not alone.
Disclaimer: This article is for informational purposes only and does not constitute legal advice. For personalised guidance, always consult a qualified advisor. AskEllie is an AI tool trained on UK SEND law but is not a solicitor.
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