Applying for Disability Living Allowance (DLA) for your child can feel overwhelming.
The form is long.
The questions feel repetitive.
And you’re already exhausted.
But here’s something many parents don’t realise:
It’s not just what you write that matters — it’s how you explain it.
Small details can significantly affect:
- Whether your child is awarded DLA
- What rate they receive
- How long the decision takes
Here are five key things that can seriously impact your outcome.
1. Writing About Your Child on a “Good Day”
This is one of the most common mistakes.
Many parents instinctively downplay difficulties. You’re used to managing them. You’ve normalised them.
But DLA is not awarded based on the rare calm day.
It is awarded based on the care and supervision your child reasonably needs most of the time.
If:
- Most mornings involve distress
- Your child needs prompting for every task
- Meltdowns are frequent
- You provide constant emotional regulation
Then that’s what needs to be described.
Write about the majority of days — not the exceptional ones.
2. Underestimating Supervision Needs
If your child cannot be left safely alone, even for short periods, that matters.
Supervision includes:
- Risk of running off (elopement)
- Poor danger awareness
- Impulsivity
- Emotional dysregulation
- Self-injurious behaviours
- Inability to judge risk appropriately
Many parents say things like:
“I just keep an eye on him.”
But if you are constantly monitoring, planning around safety, or unable to leave them unsupervised — that is additional care compared to a neurotypical child of the same age.
Don’t minimise it because you’re used to it.
3. Forgetting About Night-Time Care
Night-time support can significantly affect the rate awarded.
Ask yourself:
- Does your child wake frequently?
- Do they need settling?
- Do they come into your bed due to anxiety?
- Do you check on them regularly?
- Do they need medication, reassurance, or support overnight?
If your sleep is disrupted because of your child’s needs — that is relevant.
Night-time care can be the difference between lower and higher rate awards.
4. Not Explaining the “Why”
This is crucial.
Don’t just write:
“Needs help getting dressed.”
Explain why.
For example:
- Sensory sensitivities to clothing
- Hyper-mobility causing pain or fatigue
- Executive functioning difficulties
- Anxiety around transitions
- Fine motor delays
Decision-makers need to understand the underlying difficulty.
Without the “why,” support needs can look minor on paper — even when they are not.
5. Sending It Without Evidence
While DLA does not require a formal diagnosis, supporting evidence can make a huge difference.
Helpful documents include:
- School reports
- EHCP paperwork
- CAMHS letters
- OT or SALT reports
- Emails showing ongoing concerns
- Behaviour logs
- Medical letters
Evidence:
- Strengthens your application
- Reduces the likelihood of refusal
- Can speed up decision times
Attach copies (never originals).
One More Important Thing
Write the form as if the person reading it has never met your child.
Because they haven’t.
They are not in your home.
They do not see the meltdowns.
They do not see the exhaustion.
They do not see the emotional toll.
Be honest. Be specific. Be detailed.
This is not exaggerating.
It is accurately reflecting the level of care your child needs beyond a neurotypical peer of the same age.
Final Thoughts
Applying for DLA can feel draining — especially when you’re already carrying so much.
But clarity and detail matter.
If you’re unsure what to include, how to phrase something, or whether something “counts,” that’s exactly why we created AskEllie.
For more guidance on SEND rights, benefits, EHCPs, and navigating the system, visit:
You’re not alone in this.
And getting it right can make a real difference — not just financially, but in recognising the reality of the support your child needs.
Leave a Reply